Behold, children are a gift of the LORD,

Behold, children are a gift of the LORD,

Wednesday, October 11, 2017

Heartbroken but Blessed

I don't even know where to start on this blog post. But I do feel it is important for me to write. We were expecting our 13th child, actually we have several more angel babies we've lost very early. But this time was different. A couple weeks we went for an ultrasound and saw a baby with a heartbeat and also saw a fairly large subchoronic hemorrhage.  Baby was smaller and heartbeat a little slower than expected but no biggie I was early yet.
         2 weeks or so have passed and we went back Monday to check on the subchoronic hemorrhage. Boy, did we pray it would be gone. As soon as ultrasound started we saw hemorrhage was still there. I'm a mother to 12 so I know what a ultrasound is supposed to look like. Baby looked smaller and there was no heartbeat. Baby should of been around 8-9 weeks but measured 6.
     So here I am trying to take care of my family but knowing anytime now I will start miscarrying. I have had so many emotions I cannot even begin to understand. Yes, I've been mad at God. There I said it. But I'm not so much anymore. I know there are reasons why things happen and things like this are part of living in a fallen world. God has shown me much grace during this time. My husband has been wonderful. I cannot begin to tell you how supportive he's been.
       Many friends and family have reached out. And a sweet  family  whom we love dearly brought us supper last night and sat and talked with us. But i have gotten comments like at least you have all those kids. And yes!!! That is absolutely true . I am richly blessed and I realize some women can never have kids. I do know I'm blessed but it doesn't mean it doesn't hurt. It doesn't mean my heart was not crushed when I go from seeing a heartbeat to no heartbeat. And I know SOME who say well maybe you should stop having kids. Well, Billy and I gave our lives over to the Lord many years ago. Just because things aren't going oura way lately is not the time to say oh okay , I will take it out of God's hands and put it in mine!!! We committed to trusting the Lord whole heartedly even when our hearts break.
     Plus I think it's hard because I feel my body is failing me!!! I have Hashimotos, hypothyroidism,  my adrenals are shot, and my gut health isn't so good but I intend to work strictly on that. I'm a mom tho, have been since I was 16. And I know I'll always be a mom but I didn't realize how getting older would effect me. Since about 4 or so years ago I've had many miscarriages. But never seeing a heartbeat, then not. This one is just different. I would really covet your prayers in the days to come.

Psalm 34:18-20 (NIV)

18 The Lord is close to the brokenhearted
    and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
19 The righteous person may have many troubles,
    but the Lord delivers him from them all;
20 he protects all his bones,
    not one of them will be broken.

Saturday, March 4, 2017

Exciting News!!!!!

I just joined with Scentsy about a month ago and I absolutely love it! So, please contact me for all your Scentsy needs. I had no idea all the things Scentsy had to offer and hope to share those soon. In the meantime go to my website and look around and maybe even place a order. Contact me if you would like to do a party for have questions.

Tuesday, January 24, 2017

Never Say Never With Labor and Birth

 As I said in my last post we welcomed our 12th baby in December. What a blessing she is. She weighed 7 lbs 13 ounces and we named her Josie Joy.
        When talking about my babies I've always said I've never made it to my due date. Well that's was before my 11th child. My last baby was 10 days over and we just thought that was a fluke since I've had so many and never even made my due date. So were we ever surprised when this tiny bundle was 8 days overdue. Babies sure have a mind of their own and while I was miserable God knows the exact time they need to be born.
         Then I said I'd never ever have a baby in the water. Lol! This 12th baby was born in my bath tub. I decided last minute I couldn't do it unless I was in the water. I think my husband thought I was crazy when I said I wanted to have her in the bath. But my midwife and husband listened and in the bath we went. I don't really know what happened this time. I just second guessed myself and just felt like something telling me it had to be in the water. So our Josie Joy was born in our bath tub. Not sure I'd do it again but I really am super glad and thankful I listened to my body ( and God).
          This baby has also been the first one to have thrush and a tongue tie. I've had strep. This recovery has been hard to say the least. But I wouldn't trade her for anything. While she is a fussy baby she is also such a JOY! But I say all this to encourage women to never say never with labor and delivery. To LISTEN to your body. And to be thankful for each blessing that comes your way. :)
    Here are some pics after her delivery.

Saturday, January 21, 2017

Don't forget about your husband!

I hope to change the picture on my blog soon to a more updated one as well as update information.  We just welcomed our 12th child in December while it's been filled with bumps in the road I can say it's been filled with much joy. Anyway, back to what's on my heart.
         Ladies, our most important job as homemakers is to raise our kids well , to be a good keeper at home. But first we need to love our husbands well. I am no expert on this, in fact I fail miserably but this is something big on my heart. All to often we get caught up in the day to day and things get stagnant.  We think he should know we love him. I mean we clean the house, wash his clothes, have his children so shouldn't he know we love him. Well not really.
       First and foremost we should pray daily for our husbands. Times are hard. Especially for men. They are hit at ever turn and it's super hard for Christian men these days. Praying for him is so important. Along with that goes encourage him. Even when you don't feel like it, even when you need encouragement yourself. 
      Show him you love him. Tell him. Write him letters. Be open and honest with him. Give him little gifts.  Remind him he's your number one. Above and beyond just love him and serve him well. For different husbands this will look different. Putting him first will not only boost your marriage but make for a happier family. 
        Are you putting your husband first? Even  when it's hard sometimes? I'd love to hear how you love your husband well. I have vowed to pray daily for mine. 

Wednesday, August 24, 2016

Setting the Tone in our Homes

        It is a fact ladies , as bad as we do not want to admit it. We set the tone in our homes. Yesterday, was a rough one for me. I am 6 months pregnant with our 12th child and was feeling very good up until this week. I am TIRED! Not the I need more sleep TIRED, the cat crawling out of bed kind. And I am not proud of how I treated the people I love most yesterday. Not in the least. We blog and put on Facebook all our happy stuff and all the pat me on the back stuff. But we rarely talk about the ugly, hard days. Well, this is what this post is.
         I was not so nice to my kids or husband yesterday. I sulked and pouted about everything. Yes, I did not feel well. and Yes, I was struggling. But I needed to pray. Did I? Nope, just trying to get through the day in my own strength and how did that work for me. Um, not so well. Ladies when we hit those times right then and there we need to cry out to Jesus. He will sustain us. We CANNOT do it in our own strength and I am not sure why we think we can. Yes, my kids are sick and all I want to do is sleep but somebody has got to homeschool them. Someone has to take care of the house, my husband who has been working his behind off, someone has to get groceries.  Nope , God is not finished with me yet. If you look at me and think you see perfection or even close to it. Man, I hate to disappoint you. I am not patient, I yell, I even pitch fits at times. But the beautiful thing about it all is GRACE. And that God allowed me to wake up another day to try to do better WITH HIS HELP.
     The point of this post is while we are tired or have hurt feelings ladies we set the mood in our homes. Lets be salt and light. Not only in our own homes but in this sad, dying world. Pray, put your eyes on things that matter, find time in the Word. I am also talking to myself. We want our children to learn no matter the circumstance we can choose to have joy. We have so much to be thankful for. Let us keep those things in mind. I am so blessed. Yes, I am stressed and I will admit it but I would NEVER trade my life for anything. God is sooooo very good and when I take my eyes off Him is when I fall. Have a blessed, God filled day!

Friday, July 8, 2016

Falling away

Lately, I've just felt so defeated. I couldn't really put my finger on why but I just knew everywhere I look I feel like I can't keep up. But this morning I did my bible study, spent time praying, played praise and worship and you know what. That's it! That's why I can't keep up and am feeling defeated. I've taken my eyes off the Lord. I've been trying to do it all in my own strength.  I've been slowing falling away.
          The world can wrap up us in it so quickly we can barely find ourselves. Yes, I've still been having my prayer times but I've not had quality time with my precious Lord. And when we fall away of the help of our Father everything seems huge.
        Grace is so beautiful. I prayed God would show me where to go in the bible this morning. And sure enough it was exactly what I needed. So not only am I'm gonna do better about taking care of the mundane but also taking care of myself. Taking care of myself means taking care to keep my relationship with the Lord first and foremost. Where our treasure is our heart is also!
        My children also deserve my priorities to be in the right place. If my relationship with the Lord is right I'm a much better wife and mother. So , today I'm starting to challenge myself. No matter when or how I get it I'm gonna make time with my Lord. Each day that might look different with a full household but that's ok.

Sunday, May 15, 2016


   I have so many things I want to say in this blog post . So many thoughts going through my head because there is so much , well , just plain junk going on in the world. But one thing remains God is on the throne and there is only one way to Him. That is through Jesus Christ.
         I have been so busy hence why no blog post lately. Between a injured husband, a miscarriage, a new pregnancy, everyday life in a large family, a daughter with gall bladder issues, and so much more I couldn't begin to get into, along with sick kids the past two weeks. But I have had a lot on my heart. I am trying to get my thoughts in order but the kids are screaming  and running around like crazy people so I hope I even make sense.
          First, I want to talk about the transgender bathroom issue. I know, I know. I hear you saying ugh right about now. Yes, we are all tired of hearing about it and many of us are REALLY tired of our president pushing his agenda on us. But... this is my only time I am going to blog about this. Hopefully,lol! This is not a transgender issue. Not in the least little bit. While that is a sin that is a whole different post and a whole different subject. The people that are boycotting and are upset are not upset because of the transgender issue. They are upset because Target and now the government(with the passing of the public school thing) just said it is completely ok for anyone to use the bathroom they want. And it has already been shown what is going to happen. Tell the mother whose daughter just got choked out in a bathroom that she is overreacting when she says people should be using the bathroom of the sexual orientation they were born. This completely allows SATAN literally a straight shot into the bathroom of our children. Do you honestly think perverts are not gonna use this???? Honestly? I am also so sick of every time Christians stand up for what is right we are called names or saying we are spewing hate. Yes, some Christians go about things the wrong way but so do a lot of people. But really this isn't a christian , non christian issue either(although if you are a christian you better start standing up for what is just and right). It is a issue of safety. I cannot see how some are so blinded. This world is a sad place. I wish you could just trust people but sadly that is not the case anymore. Sin has blinded so many. Do you really think a father and husband is going to stand outside a bathroom and watch a man(because he supposedly feels like a woman that day) go into the bathroom with his wife and daughter and not do anything. This is bound to start all kinds of problems. And while all this is going on the president continues to pass things behind our backs and do things we have no idea of. WAKE UP PEOPLE! There I said my piece, now I will get off this soapbox and just continue to pray for this nation. And in the meantime NOT be shopping at Target.
         Secondly , Don't get caught up in the world. Geez, it is so especially easy to do and so very hard to continue following the Lord. But the rewards are greater than any struggle we face. This is just my temporary home and I have to remember that. I am going to be completely honest here. I did for a little while get caught up in the world and I am trying to put my focus back on where it should be. I won't go into all it did to me but I will say I lost my JOY. Nobody on this earth can feel the void in your life besides Jesus. People will let you down. I even wondered if I could continuing following the Lord's will for life. Told you I was going to be completely honest. Especially after my miscarriage. But God again has remained faithful and just. He will never leave us or forsake us. Doesn't mean he won't spank us so to say but He is always with us and his grace is sufficient. My most favorite verse I think is 2 Cor. 12:9. -"But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me." So, I will continue putting my trust where it belongs no matter what comes my way because He has blessed me so very much.
            Lastly, I just want to say do not let the devil have a foothold in your life. There is so many ways he can get in. his goal is to steal, kill, and destroy. We have become so immune to sin and such in our society we just keep going on about our business. We including myself are so self absorbed in our own lives and in ourselves we fail to see so many out there that are hurting. When did we stop loving others and being so very hateful to each other. When did the church(talking about the people not a building) stop being there for each other in their times of need. I see how beautifully the church meets some needs but then I also see how it is failed miserably with some. I want to be salt and light. Don't get me wrong. I will stand up for what I believe is just and right but I also want to just love on people. I do not hate the sinner , I hate the sin!!! My challenge to you this week is to open your eyes. Get off your phones. Talk to people. Check on others and find someone to love on this week. Someone to help. And most importantly make sure your children are okay. Spend time with them, talk to them, because they are your most important mission. 

   God is bigger than all of this!